When thinking of timezones, there are a lot of things to criticise. We could mention their arbitrary nature. We could mention their inconsistent naming convention. We could mention their political nature. But what really is behind all of their trouble, is that they are simply too imprecise.

You may have wondered, why everytime you cross from Afghanistan to China, you set your clock forward by 3.5 hours. Or why flying from London to Madrid will als set your clock forward. Or why Christ Church College in Oxford is always five minutes ahead of Oxford time. Well, it's simply because timezones are pretty moronic. The worst timezone differential which you can cross on a plane, by boat, or on foot is a whopping 24 hours! Pretty horendously idiotic that people can just travel through time by going to work, visiting a friend, or whatever else people might move about for. It is time for an alternative.

Now, I understand the one thing timezones help us with; and that is mapping days to hours. This can actually be convenient in structuring our days. So let's try to keep this attribute and get rid of all the rest. All we have to do, is remember that time is relative! Relative to what? Your position of course. So, what is relevant for this? Well, your longitudinal position is a predominant factor. A day starts with a sunrise. If you sat on the equator, watched the sunrise; then ran very quickly 15° West, you would be able to watch the same sunrise again. So to put it into terms of GMT:

GMT x 15 x Longitude

Seems simple enough. But hold on, you might think. The sun doesn't rise equally. No sir. We have to account for latitude! Now this is a bit more tricky. Turns out, days on different Latitude positions are not equal. They have different day lengths! How and why is anyones guess, and accounting for it is a bit more tricky. However, if you take my word for it, assuming you ignore changes in earth tilt, changes in earth orbit, and other funky wobbles, you can just assume the earth is a sphere, and the sun is far away.

...

So, I have tried this, and it turns out, it is more difficult than I expected. Basically, I fell into a spiral of getting stuck on singularities in rotation and the concept of a day. If you imagine standing precisely on the axis of earth, at the north or south pole. Your "day" would not consist of a 24 hour cycle, instead your day is a 365x24 hours cycle. For now, publishing this half-assed piece of writing has precendence over find the correct mathematical expression for combining these two cycles. Perhaps it is best to stick with our crude, politically driven timezones for now.